Why do I need a drink at the end of the day? - Kid 101

Why do I need a drink at the end of the day?

I’ll tell you why.

Because of homework, every single night… The phonics, the sounding out, the spellings, the maths, the time tables and the…creative craft projects.

Because of the endless chirp of “Mummy, Mum, Mama, Mummy, Mummy, Mama, Mum, Mummy, Mummy, Mum, Mama, Mum, Mummy…” (repeat to fade)

Because of the “Can I have a snack, snack please, I’m hungry, snack please, snack, snack, more food, I’m still hungry, where’s my snack, need another snack, snack, snack…” (repeat to fade)

Because of the physical abuse. Being hit with a flying shoe, walking on Lego, being kicked awake in the morning, a scooter rolling over my toes, being climbed over, sat on, tripping over toys, running after wayward kids…

Because of the emotional abuse; the tears, the screams, the upset, the whining. Because they are growing up, because they aren’t growing up fast enough, because they push me to my absolute limit.

Because I still have to bake for the cake sale, turn up for parent meetings and remember the football kit/trumpet/swim kit/snack/packed lunch/spelling book…

Because of playdates; juggling pick-ups, creating fun activities, preparing food that everyone is going to like…

Because the kids have been invited to four parties this weekend and I’ve still not bought a present or a card.

Because I have 5 loads of washing and need to clean the house.

Because I used to have a full time job and someone else did this all for me.

Because I now work from home but still have to do all the household chores.

Because I am tired but I still need to exercise and not eat cake.

Because I have to listen to my son practice his trumpet for 10 minutes every day and he only knows approximately 3 notes and one rhythm.

Because I need to do the weekly food shop and come up with interesting meals that none of the kids actually want to eat.

Because I am meant to be cooking organic meals from scratch but my kids would prefer a McDonalds.

Because of the “how are babies made?” from my eldest son.

Because of the Star Wars theme tune blaring from my TV for the fifth time this week.

Because Boy 2 wants me to pretend to be a flesh eating monster… and a dog… all whilst building a den.

Because of the spilt drink, orange peelings, sweet wrappers and spaghetti stuck to the walls.

Because of the constant noise and tantrums.

Because of the vomit, burps, snot, farts and poo.

Because I’m exhausted but still have to do the ‘bedtime routine’.

Because it’s the only way to stay awake for the precious 3 hours I get after their bedtime.

Because the days are long, oh so long.  The kids waking me up at the crack of dawn and resist sleep until the last possible moment.

Because despite of this, I still smile, laugh, encourage and love.  Because that is what being a parent is all about.

Now stop asking me and pour me a bloody glass of wine!

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